My new mission, should I choose to accept it, is to get Freshly Pressed. I wake up thinking about how to iron out my words to meet the perfect list of suggestions the kind people at WordPress suggest. I looked at their list to see how I measure up. I know they have explanations but I guess I need to look a little more closely and self-analyze.
This is what I came up with:
1. Write unique content that’s free of bad stuff.
“I”m bad… You know it!” I don’t think they mean this kind of bad. I may say I’m “angry” or that things are “bad” but I think they meant a little more dramatic than that. No one is getting unwillingly chained up in my posts, or cussing like a Pirate without booty. It’s all pretty PC, but may leave people scratching their heads a little. Is that the bad stuff they mean, head-scratching?
2. Make posts visually appealing.
It’s not a photoblog. Do I instantly fail? I’ve seen some posts that aren’t visually magnificent, but I have loved the content. Sure, we all love to lookey-loo at something, and it’s probably better to use our own stuff than someone else’s good photos. (Otherwise, I guess they get the FP honours). Anyhow, I posted a painting I did once. Sure, it was just one painting, but that was a big deal for me. Okay, it was only in one post. You mean I need a lot of photos in the same post?! Okay, I’ll take a lot of photos. You know how I hate collages? See the page on my blog called “What gets my goat.”
3. Add relevant tags.
Tags. Like dog tags? No, you want me to define it. Taxonomy. I add tags to everything. I always add ‘humor’ to my tags, because it seems this is what people like. Even when I write about something that’s stabbing my soul, I like to add ‘humor’ because maybe someone will find it and laugh (at me). I’m thankful that they read it! I also always add an animal to the tags if there was any mention of one; real, imagined or as a metaphor. You never know when a kindly animal lover will come in handy for support. Animal lovers tend to help people out more willingly than non-animal lovers. They will pick the last guy for their team. I could use more animal lovers in my life. I could use a team. We could be called the Tag-Team. Ha ha. Oops. (I’m getting carried away now.)
4. Cap off your post with a compelling headline.
All that is gold does not glitter…!
This one is easy. My titles may not be “My one year anniversary by myself” or “The 5:30 bus I missed” or “Laundry, lists and other cookie recipes.” That last one was kind of interesting. I might read that. No, all of my headlines are SONG TITLES. There, I gave it away. I didn’t mean to, because it was my secret to myself and I don’t have any secrets. Rats, if I don’t get FP’d now everyone will know. (Hey! I could use ‘rats’ as a tag. Animal lovers, pick me for the team!)
5. Aim for typo-free content.
I use the little check mark app that screens my typos. I have someone with a higher IQ than myself re-read my content before I post. WordPress says that if they like your content enough they will let you fix your typos and still get FP’d. It’s not like it’s impossible to read what I’ve written, and it’s all grammatically happy. I’m not writing in Anguish Language and saying: “Mural: Yonder nor sorghum stenches shut ladle gulls stopper torque wet strainers.” (Okay, I’ll let you off easy and translate this to: “Moral: Under no circumstances should little girls stop to talk with strangers”). This is not my translation, or my Anguish Langage writing, but you get what I mean. My writing is not like this!
So there you have it. I’ve reviewed the 5 criteria for improving your chances of getting Freshly Pressed, and how to
exploit explore this in my favor. I’m not sure if I am any farther ahead. (I did make a post that is a list now. I haven’t done that yet.)
Personally, I think the WP guys and gals just sit around and play Spin the Bottle, Blogpost edition. It’s anyone’s lucky day, on any day. And we all deserve to be Lucky. Good luck to you too.
*Are you Lucky? Have you been Freshly Pressed? Will you let your followers know about me? I’d appreciate that.