Continuing with the theme of sickness. More marathon training. Feeling good apart from feeling sick. Cold days. Wind. Letting go of what I don’t need to do. Feeling more stable health-wise. Enjoying what I am doing out of choice rather than doubt or obligation. Good practice comes from acceptance. Soccer games. Runs in the rain/sleet/snow/wind. A birthday to turn 8. Yoga at the end of every week. Fresh laundry. Warm cookies. Settling in. Getting out.
Most days I write down five things I am grateful for, big or small, subtle or apparent. I archive and post the list monthly. This is February 2014.
that I could go and watch the kid play soccer — that his enthusiasm was infectious — the confidence from a good run — an even better nap after my run — spontaneously going out for dinner.
that I could meet up with a friend for a morning run — that the fog lifted and the views were amazing on our run — yoga class — that I had space and warmth at home — that I stretched out the weekend a little longer than usual.
that the boy turned 8 years old — that the boy happily ate the cake even after my two attempts at gluten-free cake mixes — the reminder that birthdays are important — the reminder to slow down — that I figured out why my phone battery was draining so quickly.
that I had a parka to wear as the weather got cold — walking to work with my parka and gloves on — having someone else show up for an evening run workout — that we shortened the workout — getting home earlier than expected.
that my counselor always offers support and good perspectives — that I can *feel* that things have changed — caring less — caring more — realizing I need to work on my patience.
that the wind stayed away and I could run outside — the extra hot soup I had at lunch — texts from a friend — that tomorrow is finally Friday — taking the time to slow down.
snow tires — short drives — warming temps — wool sweaters — extra hot beverages.
watching the boy play soccer with his big grin — getting out for my run — running into my coach at the start of my run — feeling confident — the start of a long weekend.
meeting my coach for a snowy run — the burnt out and exhausted feeling after a run — a good restorative yoga class — coming home feeling pleasantly tired — a hot bath.
an extra day off — meeting my coach for coffee — finally getting the family out together — the wildlife photographer exhibit — a cozy bed.
choosing to eat less sugar — by-passing my favorite cookie — having leftovers for lunch — being efficient with my time — making it out for a workout in the cold and the wind.
still no cookie — recognizing that even a bad run is worth something — finally finding my favorite work pants — that I could do a load of wash before I went to work — getting to work late and no one cared.
finally eating the cookie and realizing it wasn’t the emotional satisfaction I had hoped for — reading the many reasons not to “should” – knowing that what I do now will pay back in the future — sunshine — watching the moon as I ran home.
a day to acknowledge loving ourselves — that my husband got V-day stuff for the kids — flowers — warmth in my heart — that I didn’t have to DO things for things to be okay.
the feeling that my running has suddenly turned into real training — having a purpose and a focus — watching kids play soccer — the positive energy after being outside — hot water, hot tea.
that we put new snow tires on the car — warm gloves — warm coat — the defroster in the car — a short walk to work — the ability to walk fast.
that I was finally able to get in to see a chiropractor — that his office was so close to work — getting home with a bit of breathing room — the kids being ready to go to soccer — managing.
that we can celebrate good in the world — having an office job when the weather is so miserable — having someone else show up for our outdoor run workout — feeling persistent and persevering — cereal for dinner.
choosing to take an easy run when I didn’t feel 100% — going slow in my run — stopping to stretch when I needed it — the feeling of accomplishment when you get back home — wool socks.
choosing to take an extra day off — stretching — epsom salt bath — pizza for dinner — going to bed early.
a shorter day at work — picking the kids up from soccer camp — spending time with the kids — going home and knowing it’s the weekend — feeling content.
that soccer tournaments got cancelled — the motivation to go out and run in snow and sleet and rain — the other people out on the trails who smiled in encouragement — feeling confident in my running — going out for lunch with just the boy.
snow day! — running in knee deep snow — the quiet in the trees — a yoga class that regrounded me — coming home and doing nothing.
that I was able to find something I thought I’d lost — taking the boy for a haircut — re-organizing my schedule — doing less — the kids’ patience and good moods.
that I am able to recover at home — that I can throw up and not be too phased by it — that a stomach flu is a kind of sickness that you don’t wonder whether you are sick or not or how bad it is — that my daughter brought me tea in bed — that it’s finally sunny again!
that I have a day off — that I can sleep whenever I want — that I’m not panicked about not exercising (yet!) — ginger ale — pajamas.
taking another day off to get better — dry toast — feeling slightly better — going for a very very slow jog — fresh air.
feeling more stable — eating a meal — getting through the whole day at work — packing for a ski trip in record time — a light jog that made me appreciate how much more enjoyable it is when I feel better.